Monday, October 27, 2008

Anak Datuk

Tuesday, 28 October 2008 @ 12.05pm

I was folding Eddie's underwear when Frank Moore said, "You know Anna, honestly, I like you." I didn't freak out or think that he meant in a way more than a friend. He has Martha Moore after all. After stopping short, I continued folding and said, "Huh?" I didn't understand what he meant or where it came from. Then he said, "I like your style. Your personality. Even though you are who you are, you like to keep a low profile. You don't boast about who you know or who you are."

With a bewildered look on my face, I replied, "How else am I supposed to be?" Frank continues, "No I mean, I didn't even know who you are until we came here and we had to mention who your father is at the guardhouse. Usually, when I meet people like you, they wouldn't be the way you are." I immediately get defensive. "What do you mean the way I am?"

I actually already knew where he was going with it because I'd heard it a hundred times before. People meet me, they get to know me...then they come to my house. Then I get the "I didn't know you're 'anak Datuk'". When Frank said that, it was with such caution and it came out in almost a whisper. It was as though he was saying something taboo. People have always had an image of what an 'anak Datuk' should be like. Hell, even I know what they're like (I purposely say "they" and not "we" because I believe that I am anak Papa. He ain't no Datuk in my eyes).

The description of an anak Datuk goes something like this:

They are the epitome of labels. LV made the smart move of printing their name all over their products as anak Datuk's won't need to mention who they're wearing - it's right there on the bag. ALL OVER the bag.

They are arrogant and feel that they have the right and power to do and say as they please because they're father is a Datuk (eh, fuck you la).

They will only mix and mingle with those who are of the same standing. This is something I do not understand because I think it's bullshit. And it's this perception that I get the, "I didn't know you're an anak Datuk" line. I have anak Datuk friends. And I can safely say to you now that they have looked at me as though I'm some sort of alien because I have friends who are 'normal'.

They will ONLY speak English. Malay is forbidden and only used when forced upon them. They tend to forget that they themselves are Malay and have just as black an asshole as everyone else (I'm getting a little angry writing this. My apologies.)

They don't work because they have some sort of sick belief and thinking that their Datuk father will provide money to them for the rest of their lives (even when their Datuk father is no longer around). I have actually had looks of disgust by anak Datuk's when they find out I have a second job at Get Crafty. If their face could speak, it'd say, "Eeeeww... why are you doing work meant for minions?"

Kampungs are far away places that they don't want to be associated with. If they do, they will arm themselves with laptops and dvds and iPods to kill time instead of appreciating the life there.

Raya (or any other occasion for that matter) is a time to show off. It's a time to display new clothes and jewellery and the latest technological gadgets.

Granted, not everyone is like this and not every anak Datuk is this way. There are plenty of us out there (yes, "us") who work for their money, pay their own debts and help their fathers when he's getting older. But it's rare and it's sad to say that this stereotypical image of an anak Datuk is what is more widely known and used among society as they outnumber the rest of us.

I have nothing against Datuks - at least those who actually earn their way to get their title. I have no problem with these men and women who buy gadgets or houses and properties and "show it off". Hell, they worked their asses off and they earned it. The sad thing is, the Datins and the anak Datuks who are just long for the ride bitch and boast as though they are the ones who earned their way to a title.

I really hope that people and things will change. And I hope that one day people won't look at me and say, "wow, you're an anak Datuk and you're doing laundry." I'm not trying to say anything about our conversation that night Frank. It just got me thinking. You are probably the hundreth person to have said all those things to me and I always feel two things whenever I hear it. 1. I'm glad and I appreciate the fact that my friends have taken time to get to know me instead of wanting to know me because of who my father is. 2. Amused and a little sad. Amused because you all have a look that says, oohh...I have to be careful around her now (but thank God you all forget that and just treat me as normal). And sad because at the end of the day, I am and will always be...anak Datuk (*vomiting into a bucket*).


Ms Martha Moore said...

you are??


i love you like my real sister!

no datuks or dato's or datins or even Perdana Menteri of Malaysia can take that away from us.... yes us....


i love you SIS!

anna r said...


anita r said...

hmm...i'm one of those too and i have had to go through that crap longer than you :p

but it's really up to us, how we carry ourselves

there just happens to be a misconception and i believe these comes from watching too much drama on tv (hey i love watching Malay dramas) - that anak datuks and their parents MUST be rich, DON'T have to work, have at least THREE houses all over the world, go for holidays OUTSIDE their country of origin, wear BRANDED items only and names like GAP, ZARA and GUESS are their daily wear, MUST marry other anak datuks/tan sris - that those who are anak datuks are just so damn lucky

how many times have i had 'friends' telling me "kau tak kerja pun tak apa, kau kaya". and to that i say, if i am so damn kaya, why would i slave away from 9 - 5, 5 days a week at a job that pays less than RM10,000?

so you know what? just be yourself, who cares what people think. if they are genuine friends, they'll stick by you through and through. it doesn't matter whether you are an anak nelayan, or anak datuk or even a royal princess. at the end of the day, you're just you.

Ms Martha Moore said...


im inspired with kakak's word!


that is so true....

at the end of the day we are what we are and what we are is always OK!!