Monday, 22 December 2008 @ 6.17pm
Is it wrong to have feelings? Is it wrong to feel disappointed? Is it wrong to want to try and spend whatever little time is available with you? Is it wrong that I feel a little down for not being able to see you tonight?
Yes, I remember what we spoke about the other night. Yes, it was me who said we should do as we agreed. Yes, it was also me who's been the so-called understanding one.
I've decided to concentrate on my work. I've decided to focus on my career. I've decided that I won't care if I don't get to spend so much time with you anymore. I've decided to pursue every free moment of my time doing another job, not even bothering to make time on your off day.
Call me needy if you want. Clingy. But really? Is that fair? How often do I call you? Once? Twice a day? Is that too clingy? Is it wrong that I want to spend time with you? That I look forward to our nights out? Our rare moments of free time together that's not spent with our friends or in the company of our families? I've asked you once, twice, thrice...when was the last time it was just you and me? Do I have to beg you for time? Is it really wrong for me to want to spend what little free time I have with you? How often do I even see you? Think about it.
Yes, it's selfish. Yes, it's not fair. But no, I don't think it's unfair. I'm just doing what you're doing.